How to Deal with Toxic Family

Familys can be toxic and annoying. All this while not starting a complete argument and ruining Christmas or any other gathering that you may be having

You know me and my endless tips to deal with toxic people. So let us dive into familg members. These tips are for holidays and all the other 10 months of the year.

First we shall tell a story. For those who don’t know, I use a character named Moonshine to help you visualize events. Just search Moonshine and you can find other posts with her

Girl and puppy just merged together to make it Moonshine and Moonpup

It was Moonshine first time hosting the family Christmas dinner at her own house.  This year had to be perfect. From the food to the decorations to the topics of conversation. She knew she could not disappoint her mother. Not to mention this is the first time the family has been together since her birthday which was a disaster.


The morning of the Christmas dinner, Moonshine hears a loud knock on the door. The rainbow glow of the early morning gleemed through the windows as she opened the door. It was her mother.


“Mom what are you doing here so early in the morning?” She questioned as she saw the red, rolling cooler her mom had with her.


“Well dear I had to make sure to bring the dinner and to make it. You know you won’t be able to make the ham correct. Let mama take care of it.”
Her eyes rolled in the back of her head as she couldn’t help but nod. She knew her mom would not go away.


“Oh sweeting you have not even decorated. We shall go to the store when it opens. Is the boyfriend coming?”


“Ma 1. you know I don’t have a boyfriend 2 I have decorations and 3 it is 6 am there is plenty of time to decorate
.”

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The relationship questions

Nosey family members always bugging you. Same questions every time. What to do?

  1. Think of what to say in advance
  2. Try to turn the tables. Know some dirty gossip? Say it
  3. Be honest
  4. Yell and scream*
  5. Start singing*
  6. Act like you didn’t hear anything

* These tips might not work but I think it would be fun to mix it up*

Women in blue shurgging at a question
Source

Someone taking over

It may suck but you should be grateful. Not everyone has in laws or parent that even come over for dinner. Be thankful while you can. To make things better-

  1. Offer to help
  2. Ask questions about the way they cook

Arguing

Arguments with family members happen. The best thing to do is breathe. Try to be the one who stops the argument and not the one who starts it or goes to extremes.

Play some loud music to drown out the arguing. Hopefully that will make them shut up long enough for you to say something like:

“Family this is the holidays. We can aruge another day.”

Two people arguing with megaphones for heads
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Things become too unruly

If you can’t stop the arguing or the drama then it is time to call it quits. If you are not hosting the party then feel free to leave.

If you are then tell everyone to leave. Tell them they are out of control and let them take some food.

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Sometimes this is all that can be done. It sad when you have to cancel a family dinner so quickly but better then to keep the drama going. There is always another time.

Limit alcohol

Limit how much you drink and how much other people are allowed to drink. Alcohol is one of the main reasons why people and family’s argue.

Alcohol can make you less stressed. Just make sure no one drinks to the point where they make the night bad for everyone

In conclusion

Just breathe. It may seem like the world is going to explode or the night will last forever. It won’t.

Cherish these moments

Always remember when all is said and done, spend some much needed time alone. Self care is the best care and chocolate. You can check out Self care tips for beginners if you need help

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